Saturday, September 7, 2013

2013 read #116: The Good Fairies of New York by Martin Millar.

The Good Fairies of New York by Martin Millar
242 pages
Published 1992
Read September 6
Rating: ★★★ out of 5

The copyright date on this small-press edition says 2006, but I was hardly two pages into this book when I said to myself, "No way. No way this is from 2006. This was published in the early '90s, it had to have been." Sure enough, a quick Google search confirmed an original publication date of 1992. I don't know whether to feel accomplished or glum that I can so readily identify, on stylistic grounds alone, when a piece of fantasy fiction was published.

Maybe I shouldn't feel either, though, because pinpointing the '90s origin of this story was about as difficult as approximating the date of a blond boy in a bowl haircut and stone washed jeans and white hightops. This book is incredibly friggin' '90s. It feels like an extended version of Mike Resnick's story "Revolt of the Sugar Plum Fairies," the most dated story from the incredibly dated early '90s anthology After the King. While Millar has the decency to avoid TV commercial catch-phrases and none of his characters speak in jive (giving him two points up on Resnick), he nonetheless manages to cram in just about every stylistic convention of early '90s fantasy: a too-cool-to-care tone and hip sarcasm, winking references to older conventions of the genre, attempts at grittiness largely at odds with the flippant tone, heroic (but schizophrenic) homeless, freshman-level social commentary direct from Pearl Jam B-sides, casual (even "comedic") substance abuse. I don't know if the ghost of a Johnny Rotten stand-in coming down from heaven to find his guitar is a '90s fantasy cliche, but it feels like it should be. The characters, with the exception of the two human leads, are interchangeable and scarcely defined, which made the frequent two-paragraph digressions to the secondary "stories" seem dull and mostly pointless. (Hey, this fairy king in Cornwall has industrialized his kingdom and all his fairies are factory serfs! Oh, you still remember that from two pages ago? Well, I have nothing new to add to this plot thread, just thought you'd like the reminder.)

The main two humans are caught in another tiresome storytelling convention of their own, a rom-com. I'm actually a bit surprised this hasn't become some sort of summer vehicle for B-list actors. The woman is totally a punk-rock hippie girl stereotype, a manic pixie dream girl, except she has a colostomy bag and motivations (however flimsy) of her own. (An artsy manic pixie with Crohn's disease -- truly, a heroine for the internet age.) The man is a bigoted schlub and misanthropist. I pictured him differently while reading the book, but now that I'm thinking of casting calls, I could totally see him as a young Jack Black. The wider story around them is a run of the mill farce, full of misunderstandings and miscommunications and silly MacGuffins changing hands faster than I cared to keep track of them. Farces can quickly grow boring if not handled with panache, and this one quickly became boring.

I'm not sure why I'm being so generous with the rating. It wasn't a painful read, and I enjoyed myself (very) mildly, but that should rate two and a half stars, if I'm trying to be consistent. But whatever, I'm not. It's all arbitrary anyway.

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